January 20, 2010

Day 9 Meditation- Birthday Belief

Today is my birthday. My goal is to get this up on the web while it is STILL my birthday, to get caught up. I am sick, yesterday I wondered if I was actually going to be able to finish this project. Lily and Chris have been terribly ill for over a month, I was worried yesterday that I would get as sick as them, worried about how skinny I am and if my body could take the constant vomiting, the deep coughing which stops the body from breathing for a scary number of seconds following the vomiting. I wondered if I could handle the fear I watched both Chris and Lily experience from not knowing if the breathing would ever start again. I even asked Michael if he would finish this blog for me if I got too sick to do it. The thing with all this is, if I believe this is how things are going to go then just maybe they will?! I look down at the fortunes taped to my computer and read “when you believe something you make it true for you”. With this in mind here is my new belief.

I am sick, I need rest and comfort and love and joy. I am capable of making sure I get all these things, especially surrounded by so many who love me. I will be sick for a short period of time, which is perfect since I do need some restoration. I will get well in plenty of time to go back to school in February, and will also go and spend 5 days at Esalen dancing with many loved ones, renewed, refreshed. I have a back up plan for my blog, if things get hard I can get Michael to write it for a short period of time, having back up helps me to stay strong. I am going to keep a positive, optimistic and accepting of what is, knowing it is all perfect AND I am going to have a happy happy birthday.

We took a family shot on the computer on this day which marks my 36th year. Getting 6 people to hold still for the camera is no small task.
But eventually we got a great shot. Do I have a beautiful family or what?! And everyone in this pic with the exception of Michael is sick too...Michael is sporting a black eye though...wanna know how he got it? I bet you do :o

“What would a perfect birthday look like for you?” is the question in 12 days journal #283

P.S. This post went up one day late, I didn’t catch up for my birthday, but the day after is pretty damn good!

P.P.S. My journalling software kept uploading the wrong picture, I have tried a bunch of times but I can’t make it work. I am going to have to work on it tomorrow, so as it turns out this post is 2 days late, still not too shabby.

1 comment:

  1. A perfect birthday for me would be a surprise party, with all of the people who love me most in attendance, ready to get crazy and celebrate heartily! :-)