February 17, 2010

Day 1 Photo Op- Bean Weary

I am flying today with my friend Jilly Bean, she is really just called Jill, but I like Jilly Bean better. We are embarking on a 10 day trip together. Our paths will split a few time, she is going to Big Sur before me, and will be hanging out in San Fran while I am over in Marin at school, for at least one day anyway.

Road tripping is one of my all time favourite passions. I have a gypsy soul, and moving around, driving from town to town with no agenda ROCKS! I have no idea what the next 10 days will bring, but I know I will grow. I know my relationship with Jill will grow.

I love my sisters, not the blood kind, I don’t have any of those, the other kind. The friends who stick by me through thick and thin, the ones who will tell me like it is, who will forgive my floating in and out of their lives because of my nature and lifestyle. The ones who will say “What happened to the rest of you?” when they become concerned about my weight loss. The ones who want me at their birth even though I haven’t really shown up for them the way I want to. I love my sisters...AND...I have a much harder time with my relationship with womyn than I do men. I am not sure why this is, or if it matters, but I do see how it keeps me from getting as close to them as I would like to. I don’t believe my public school upbringing did me any favours in this area. Clumping children together in large same age groups leaves then scrambling to establish some sort of pecking order. With age out of the picture we turned to other ways of deciding how our pack would function. Somehow competing for boys and grades had us in competition with one another. The boys seemed to have more healthy outlets for this competition, we girls turned to catty behaviour. I have heard it said that “girls are just like that”. I don’t buy this for a second. I believe we all come in wanting to connect, understand ourselves and others, that it is cultural structure that has breed this catty nature. Anyway before I go too far out on a tangent I want to just say that friendships with other females have always felt more dangerous, or more filled with potential for pain, or at least they did. I am really coming into my relationships with my sisters, loving the communion and support. I am excited about my 10 days with Jilly Bean.

“What is your relationship with your sisters like?” is the question in 12 days journal #311

SIDE NOTE: I accidentally deleted the pictures for both today and tomorrows entry from my iPhone...can you friggen believe it...so no pic. So sad...I will make up for it though...promise.

1 comment:

  1. I am seriously, utterly BLESSED in my relationships with my girl friends. We are there for each other, we cheer each other on, we tell the truth with love and kindness, we respect each other and our journeys, and most importantly, we laugh and cry and rant and smile with each other and have such an amazing and satisfying connection to each other. I feel very lucky to have them in my life.