June 29, 2009

Day 8 One on One- Hear(s)t Castle

If you are a believer in sustainability, simplicity , and subtlety, then the Hearst Castle might be a challenge to enjoy. I am a believer, but today as I walked around the “Enchanted Hill”, I suspended these beliefs in lieu of a deep appreciation for a man who choose to follow his heart. Yes, the castle was an exercise in opulence, indulgence and excess, yet I admit I was in a state of awe when I learned of the years of commitment it took to turn this rugged piece of coastal land into a sight which can not be fully appreciated in pictures. I will let you give it a shot though, here are a few of the pictures we took today (again I have only added a few for ease of loading, the rest can be seen here in an album on facebook )




Ok I fully admit, I am fresh out of the Hearst Castle: Building the Dream IMAX film. I know its spectacular panoramic shots and expertly choreographed score are designed to make me feel the way I am, but I am going with it, because it feels good! It feels good not to get caught up in the poo-pooing of what things cost and how the money could have been spent, which incidentally I agree with, and to focus instead on the generosity of this mans dream. Creating an adult fantasy-land, where billiards, swimming, horseback-riding, eating abundant meals grown and raised on the property, theatrics and play was his heart desire. Not just for himself, but for the many folk, from all walks of life, that he brought to Casa Del Grande. William Hearst came from money, then went on to make his own fortune. His way of following his heart, and making play a priority was certainly lavish, there is no doubt. And this is likely unattainable for most. But the idea of following a dream, and choosing fun, is something that all can do, in their own way, within their own means. When I saw old film reels of what went on at the Hearst Castle, I was reminded of Dance Camp, of all the fun and play that we created, and was created for us by the organizers. I met so many there who were following their hearts desire to find creative expression in play. So I choose to appreciate William Hearts' principles of following his heart, of choosing fun. And I will simply apply my own principles where his don’t work for me.

I realized something today about this commitment. In the beginning the idea was to choose one of my sweet ones, then go spend a chunk of one on one time with her. I have let go of this somewhat contrived way of carving out time. As I walked around helping Rosy with her “treasure hunt” form that was given to her by an exhibit employee, I began to fret a little that I seemed to spend more time with her than the other two, and more time again with Lily than Ayla. I was thinking, ‘ok, tomorrow I better take Lily or Ayla on a special outing’. I realized pretty quickly that this was silly. Rosy is the youngest, the one who still needs her parents most. Ayla, a teen who uses us as home base but satellites out often, making her own way in the world. Lily is naturally somewhere in between the two. So I am going to relax a little with the “one on one” thing. Trust that in following the intention behind the original commitment, which is to focus on my baby girls, free from distractions, that it will be fulfilled. I was following my heart when I chose this commitment and am going to run with that.

“How have you followed your heart?”, is the question in the front cover of 12 days journal #77, or at least it will be once I make it. I can’t believe I have to make journals again!


  1. Hmmm, that's a tough one. I'm not sure how to answer it. Most often, I do just listen to my heart. More specifically, though, I've been working hard to follow my heart in terms of finding for myself more activities and experiences that feed my soul and spirit, like going to kirtan, finding a yoga class at a date/time that I can attend and that fits my body in the now, developing rituals when I feel they are needed, etc., so that's been a strong focus for the past few months.

  2. I am re reading my blog.... for real this time. this was the first comment I have read... Damn it is a good one. a Fertile one... thank you Angela.... my faithful support through this project... I love you.