October 25, 2009

Day 6 Listen- Listening to the Mystic

I listened today. Not in a new way, I have listened this way before, but today was different. I let go of the embarrassment, the ideas, the worries about what others might think, let go of not trusting that they want me to shine.

“Let your beauty shine, the world needs it“. I was told this by a womyn from Florida, a womyn I have met before but do not remember her name. I love her so, she came to me today completely vulnerable, tears streaming, not because she wanted anything from me, but to tell me that she sees me, encouraged me to keep it up, the being me thing that I have going on. Why not? I am the only one I can be.

So this me, this imperfect, vulnerable, self judging me, danced with a boy named Sage today. The first time I noticed him in the room, I saw a boy with autism, he had curved his hands smooth, with holding and rubbing, hand over hand. His eyes saw what lay above us all but could not muster the connection right here...or so I thought, this was my idea about Sage. His father took him lovingly round the dance floor, so much love. It was palpable how much this man loved his son, I didn’t have to ask to know Sage was his son, it was right there on the surface. Sometime later after an experience in the dance where I tapped into a moment from my past, a moment of fear and reclamation, I found myself kneeling before Sage, my teacher. I imagine him a mystic, and asked him, with my body, with my heart, if he would teach me. I noticed that we were connected in movement, mine was big and measured, his smaller, subtle, yet there, along with mine, we moved in unison. He lowered his eyes, not quite to mine, but enough. He began to let go of the grip of hand holding hand, his arms began to rise up. Then spontaneous laughter, like music! We danced, and I listened, listened to his body with my body, and we connected in a rare way, a sweet rare beautiful way. What a gift, what a glorious gift.

I saw his father later, a ceramic artist with a gentle way. He thanked me, I thanked him. I didn’t see Sage again. I remember his eyes though, and his gentle soft hands, hand holding hand, in such a particular way. I wonder what it might be like to walk amongst this world as a mystic in the way that Sage is, to see the world through those eyes, through those hands.

The less I talk, the more I listen, I see, or perhaps hear the mystics, and I am so overjoyed that they are everywhere. Such beauty in this world, such beauty.

”Where do you see beauty in this world?“ is the question in 12 days journal #196

(The Soul Motion Crew at this years Madrona MindBody Institute Vinn Marti Workshop, what an amazing group of beings! Picture Taken by David Conklin)


  1. Thank you for this. It brought me to tears.

  2. Everywhere and nowhere. It finds me when I'm not looking for it...I find it when I'm looking...sometimes it is nowhere to be seen but it is still there. Eh, too many things lately in my life I'm just not finding the right words for. I hope what I'm trying to say comes through.