April 27, 2009

Day 5 Open Heart Letter- Pulpit revisited

So many metaphors! After grappling all morning with how to follow my calling, how to commit. I find that the pulpit rock trail had been revamped since I was there last. I had committed to hiking it as it was. The entrance of the trail was through private property, it is steep and dusty, not very safe. Yet this didn’t stop me. Then I return once the commitment has been completed and there are the men putting in the infrastructure. No word of a lie, a stream of men in hard hats, reflective vests with pick axes thrown over their shoulders. It was all I could do to stop myself from singing out, “Hi Ho! Hi Ho! it’s off to work we go!“ The message I take from this Universal offering is to commit to what is in my heart regardless of what infrastructure or societal worth is placed there, commit, walk the path no matter it’s condition and just trust that some day soon the line of workmen will show up and build what is necessary for others to follow.

Today's letter will be sent to another friend who lives in Portland, Oregon. I found her In California a couple of years ago. She has grace and confidence and wisdom. She sought me out, could see how I was struggling with an open door, one I was afraid to walk through. She advised me to either walk through or shut it, said it didn’t matter which I chose, that it would be how I felt about my choice that would help me find the answers. I would so like to deliver this letter in person, sit in her home, talk, laugh, and leave like I always have with renewed clarity, and less judgement around who and what I am.

12 days journal # 14 is going off to Portland tomorrow with the question ”What are your greatest gifts?“, written inside. I plan to follow it soon. To go visit my sweet friend there, her and her hot tub ;o)

1 comment:

  1. The first and biggest one that comes to my mind is the Nietzsche quote: That which does not kill us makes us stronger. My greatest gift is that I never let anything kill me; I only let it make me stronger.