December 18, 2010


We are finally in Mexico! And it was no small feet! While waiting for our papers we did $300 damage to the camper, endured a torrential rain storm in the dessert, and Chris and I had our first real fight in months.

It was great actually. We both had so much pent up on this pressure cooker of the trip that it needed releasing. By the end we were cuddling while I cried tears which desperately needed to flow.

I have been through a lot in the last 5 months. The admission to myself that my relationship with Michael while incredible and loving was also debilitating and abusive; the pregnancy that came just weeks after the break up while I was in the midst of a painful hip injury that STILL has me grounded from performing or even dancing. Top that off with the miscarriage that lasted 49 days and then leaving my home for a 7 month journey.... and ya... I needed to let some emotions flow!

I know that conflict has to exist in a healthy growing relationship but I had become VERY shy of it. The way Michael and I dealt with it was not effective, in fact I would go so far to say it was destructive. I realized I was shying away from sharing myself with Chris because I had come to fear conflict. Well it showed up 2 nights ago when I could no longer deal with the sadness which is still seeping along with the anxiety of Ayla being in Mexico without us. She flew into Mazatlan yesterday with my mother in law, we were suppose to pick them up at the airport, but were still stuck in Tucson when they landed. My mama bear came out and so did my claws! Luckily Chris and I have almost 2 decades of experience dealing with conflict and in the end it was just what we needed.

With all the drama out of the way the Universe opened up the gates for us and Chris’s papers arrived yesterday afternoon. We set out this morning at 6 am to take full advantage of daylight hours, we are only travelling in the day for safety reasons. At the moment we are in San Carlos, Sonara.


WE are leaving tomorrow at 5am, so I am going to finish up my Chamomile tea and head to bed in the newly fixed camper, and dream of tomorrow night when I get to sleep in a BED!!

“What do you suppress?”

1 comment:

  1. We got kicked out of.....Mexico!?!? Man we experience some bizarre things together. I'm so glad that you are writing again.