Day 8 Photo Op- Mac Fest

What a trip this place is. It is process land, like a huge multi layered onion. So many beautiful folk filled with light and questions, shadow and yearning. So many on a path of discovery for self, discovery of the source eternal, trying to reconcile the two as one. Letting go of the idea of duality is a process with many layer, and Esalen has a way of tearing them away in quick succession.

I didn’t go to dance this morning. I went instead to help Rachel pack up Skylah and all the stuff babies require when travelling. After cuddles and aknowledgments of each others wonder, she left, on her way back to LA. Then I called my family. There were tears, onions are known for causing tears. I spoke with Michael, Chris and Ayla, it was so nice to speak with all of them. Each gave me a piece of what I needed to remember that I am whole here, even as I delve through so many layers. I love my family, we are so very beautiful, what we have created is magical.

With so little time left in the morning class I came to the lodge to write. It took till nearly noon for this to happen because it is so very hard not to get drawn into amazing conversations in this place. When I finally did find a place to settle down and write I found myself in a room full of my own people...Mac people. If there was an Olympics for new age sensitive types it would be sponsored by Mac. I am currently sitting in a room with 8 macs, 9 if you include the iPhone I took the picture with. It is such a funny phenomenon, this Mac revolution...I do so love my mac.



“What tools do you use to help you in your day to day life?” is the question in 12 days journal #318

Day 7 Photo Op- Valentine for God

Valentines was a little hectic this year, I felt a little stretched. Because of this I missed sending a Valentine to my main man...God.

Nearly 2 weeks late I created this drawing while in the dance. I have been taking it easy, not dancing as hard as I usually do, wanting to take care of this body of mine. I am healing, I am doing great, and I am being mindful not to push myself too hard. So for part of today instead of dancing, I doodled, wrote, created beauty with pens and paper rather than with my body. This creation began to emerged as I scribbling down the words spoken allowed by my teacher, friend and guru Vinn. I know that last one will really irk him, but hey, it is truth. He is the closest one outside myself that I have considered a Guru, an everyday mystic. Eventually I added colour to the drawing, and some more words. I didn’t start out with the intention of creating a Valentine, but this the wondrous thing about journals, magic emerges from the smallest of scribbles. My own personal journal has been sure a source of solace during the creation of the 12 days project, a place to put some things just for me, God, and now and then all of you.

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(“I don’t know no tantra mantra, or ritualistic workshop. I only know you. Hold my Hand.”, “Slowly, Slowly, Slowly, Slowly......”)


The words on the Valentine are not Vinn’s. I was so entranced by the dance, by the voice of this mystical man who creates along with all of us a majestic manifestation of love, that I missed the author. It doesn’t really matter though, trace anything back far enough and it all come from the same source, The Source Eternal of All That is Known...some call it God, some the Goddess, there are many names. Today for brevity’s sake I choose to use God.

God, will you be my Valentine?

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“How do you seek connection with others?” is the question in 12 days journal #317

Day 1 Decision Time- Here a Blog, There a Blog...

I’m back!

Having Michael write my blog was so great for many reasons. I got a break number one...PHEW! Then there was watching him day after day pouring over his words, changing little fragments, being so careful. Seeing how commitment he was to doing it. You may have noticed he was much more timely with his entries than I have been lately! Then there was the content, what a beautiful man! What an honest man... day 2 was a little hard for me at first, he was just so honest, talking about getting me healthy again and having a baby...wow. There was also the part where he got to learn the in’s and out’s of blogging. I got to experience first hand the creation process as well as guiding him through the techie side of things, theses words you read on the screen, are but one part of blogging.

While Michael was writing I took the opportunity to take my computer into our local Mac store, Digerati. I met Ben there, or perhaps I could call him the “Mac Daddy”. He was fun and helpful, cleaned up my filthy machine (really, it was just gross!) and did some internal work as well, got my machine up from turtle speed to possum... I really need a new computer but right now it is not going to happen so he patched me up and sent me on my way for next to nothing.

When I was leaving he asked if I would be interested in teaching a workshop on blogging. I had never considered this idea until now. Hell ya I will teach a workshop! I have learned a lot about blogging by simply doing it every day for nearly a year, how to flog (an English term which means to sell) the blog, how to create something that brings people to the site, how to track progress of certain entries and events. I never quite followed all of what I learned about blogging, as you can see I STILL write really long posts which is a blogging non-no but then this is a lesson in and of its self. Nothing is set in stone, there are always going to be guidelines and there are always going to be the ones you don’t follow and sometimes this creates a whole new guideline.

Blogs are an amazing tool. They are grass roots news. They are a way in which a person like me, a 36 year old womyn from Canada, can have my story broadcast and read. I never imagined my following would get so big...I fantasized about it before I really knew what I was asking for, I didn’t really imagine this would happen, seems I forgot what a fantastic manifester I am! It is still amazing to me that so many want to know what I have to say, that you are reading this right now. Blogging...wow. I WILL teach a workshop on it soon, and don’t you worry, when I do you will know it because being a full time blogger has certainly taught me how to use facebook to its full advantage to flog just about anything! Ah...the internet...imagine the world without it.

Speaking of blogs...one of the reasons Michael did my blog was a test run for blogging. If you enjoyed reading his work, click here and go check his blog out.

And thank you Baby, for the break, for what you wrote, for being in my life, for being you.

(Michael writing in Oso, I believe this was Day 11 of Michael Land)

“What do you teach?” is the question in 12 days journal #299